groping darknes...in search of "me"...

it was dark outside...winter was nearing its end for the year...and a pleasant breeze crawled in silently and made me feel its existance prompting a ticklish feel down my neck n ears...i took a deep breath...it smelled of the raindrops...it smelled like when the first drops fell over thirsty dry land...a very unusual thing to happen in the middle of Feb...but it did rain today...a few drops though...
i inhaled more and more of the fragrance, putting my lungs to xtreme pressure untill something ached inside...i had to slow down...
i guess i just wanted to capture the moment ...the fragrace...the darkness of the night ,into my numb heart...
and all of it ...the cool breeze...the smell...the darkness...took me on a time machine to the days.. so distant now...that i had almost lost its existance...
a time when life was generous..."dreams were to come true some day"-- hope was still alive...and the thought of "love" was the loveliest of all...
the rain when came to the doorsteps...as if it came just for me...the birds hurried back to their shelter...n i, with open arms welcomed the rain...i had no wings but my dreams used to take me to an altitude... no bird could imagine ..to fly...
n at the night hours...as i laid down my lazy bones on my warm bed..the friendly moon peeped in
through my window...to give me company...
and there came the soft wind that touched my face with the pampering shiver...
ohh!!! how i miss those days...vacant but full of life...
n today...back to reality...i find myself sitted alone in the darkness...groping throught the dark...searching "me"...
....failure....
i guess i hav just "lost" myself...a little while ago.....